Matthew 6:26 – Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?
I realize you may never understand this, but every bit of who I am wants what is best for you. I never want you to experience pain. I never want you to feel loss. I never want you to wonder if you are worthy. I also realize that it is inevitable that you experience these feelings. The things that break your heart break mine as well. Tonight I realized that I might never be number one in your mind. I may never be your priority. That will never change my desire to want the world for you.
I wish I could experience life with you but I can’t. I won’t be there when things feel like they are falling apart. I probably can’t pick up the pieces and help you put them back together when you feel hurt or rejected. At best, I’ll be able to kind of relate to you. I wish this were not the case. I want to be your best friend. I want to always be there for you.
I once lived an incomplete and broken life. I didn’t understand love. I surrounded myself with things and people. It seemed important at the time. Understand that there isn’t a single possession I own that I wouldn’t trade for a 5 minute conversation with you while looking at your beautiful face, into your beautiful eyes. I would trade it all if I could know for sure that you felt loved, safe, and secure. I constantly wish I could hold you in my arms and keep you safe, and just let you know I care. I am trusting God to make sure you understand your value.
Lord, thank you for teaching us to love. Let my girls know that they are cared for, that they are loved, they are appreciated. Let them never forget their value to both of us, their place in our hearts and each other’s.